Super Smash Bros Insanity 2
by Kojinka
Summary: Brawl has been out here for a few months, so here's a sequel to the only Smash Bros. fanfic that I ever completed. Only a sequel by title; plots don't connect. Will not be updated very often due to lack of interest.
1. Chapter 1

The assist trophy held up his fist, hesitating to knock on the door

AN: Most of you probably thought I was dead. In all honesty, the only reason, I'm uploading it here is because I said in the last chapter of SSBI 1, which is uploaded here at , that I might write a sequel. Eventually, I did. You don't have to read the first one before reading this. I will not connect the plots. This is a sequel by title, not story. SSBI took place during Melee, and SSBI2 takes place in Brawl. Shadow fans be warned. He is out of character, mainly because he is one of my least favorite Sonic characters.

Oh, and if you don't watch YouTube Poop, you might not get some of the jokes

VVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVV

The assist trophy held up his fist, hesitating to knock on the door. 'I can't believe I'm resorting to this,' he thought. His flat chest retracted as he sighed. 'It's either put up with him, or cut my wrist with an anthro complaining about life!' He gave three short knocks on the door. No response. The assist trophy held his pointy ear against the door.

ZZZZZZZZZ bbbblllllltttttt

'Farting in his sleep again?!' The assist trophy rubbed his temples. 'What am I getting myself into?' He let out a growl, when he finally shouted out. "Open this freaking door before I stomp it down!"

"Says who?!" a groggy voice barked from the other side of the door.

"You know very well who's speaking! Now quit-a playing dumb, and open up! I need to have a word with you!"

The door opened. The tall assist trophy was greeted short, round man, only to cover his eyes the instant he saw the little man's attire. "Gah! Make yourself-a decent, Man-boobs!" The assist trophy slammed the door.

"What?" the heavy-set man asked from the other side of the door in a smart-alecky tone.

"Wario," the slender assist trophy sighed. "Get some-a clothes on!"

"C'mon, Waluigi!"

"Just-a because we're brothers does not-a mean I have to see you nude!"

"Oh, fine. If you're going to be a spoiled sport." Wario opened the door, fully dressed in his biker attire. "Come on in!"

Waluigi was not going to ask how his brother dressed up so quickly. He stepped into Wario's dorm.

"So," Wario rested his arm on his 32' TV. "What did you want to speak to me about?"

Waluigi paused for a moment. "It's about Shadow."

"So you finally admit that you're a furry?" Wario patted Waluigi on the back. "I'm-a proud of you, little brother!"

"Shut up, fatty! I am not attracted to anthros, nor am I gay!" Waluigi leered. "You are not easy to put up with, but, compared to Shadow, you're the ideal roommate."

"He can't-a be that bad."

"At least you don't-a shout 'MARIAAAA' every ten seconds! Emohog either whines about-a life or blurts out a random line. It was-a making ME emo, and I just-a wanted to slap him!"

Wario raised an eyebrow. "So, why didn't you?"

"And refuel the dying fire? No thanks."

"What about-a me and the other Mario characters on the roster? We get to throw a few punches at Sonic."

"That is a completely different circumstance, and you know that."

"So, what do ya want me to do?"

Waluigi fell silent.

"Why were you hanging around Shadow anyway?" Wario asked.

"He was assigned to be my roommate in the AT wing."

"How badly do you hate him?"

"Enough that I'm asking to room with my brother, if you don't-a mind, Bro."

Wario stared at Waluigi for a moment. "Master Hand probably won't approve, but considering that I'm not fond of Emohog either," Wario arm-locked Waluigi and gave him a light noogie. "Make yourself at home, little bro!"

Sonic sat in the Smash Mansion's entertainment center, watching YouTube videos on the Wii's Internet channel.

"But look at this!" Came from the TV speakers.

"That's no good," Sonic commented as he saw the length of the video game password that the man in the video had to enter in.

"Sonic the Hedgehog," a dark voice rang in Sonic's ear.

The blue hedgehog turned around. "Hey, Shadow," he greeted "Care to join me?"

"WHERE IS THAT DAMN FOURTH CHAOS EMERALD?!"

"What? Oh, not this again!" Sonic rubbed his temples.

"FIND THE COMPUTER ROOM! MARIAAAAAA!!"

-SLAP-

"Stop cutting yourself, Shadow!" Sonic yelled at the spontaneous hedgehog. "The loss of blood is making you crazy!"

"Thank you, Sonic," Shadow panted. "I needed that."

The two hedgehogs sat on the sofa.

"He should be glad that he doesn't have his own game," Shadow muttered.

"Who should be glad?" Sonic cocked his head toward his anti-hero counterpart.

"The 'LOL WUT' pear."

"What?" Sonic chuckled. "When did he start saying that?"

"WHO CARES?"

"I'm interested."

"MAH BOI MAH BOI MAH BOI MAH BOI-"

"I should never have shown you the Internet," Sonic sighed.

"You wanna dip Luigi's hands in warm water while he's-a sleeping?"

"No, Wario. That's too simple." Waluigi paused for a few seconds, deep in thought. Finally, a light bulb flashed above his head. "I have an idea." The towering assist trophy leaned, whispering his scheme into his brother's ear.

"What?! That's just sick and cruel!"

"Okay, okay, okay. How about…" Waluigi whispered in Wario's ear again.

"That's better!"

VVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVV

What're those boys up to? snicker Yes, Shadow is supposed to be random in this.

If you're wondering where I am nowadays, I upload most of my fanworks at DeviantART. Username: KojinkaLuigiGodzilla. I'm more of a drawer than a writer.


	2. Chapter 2

-the next morning-

"Sleeping-in again," Waluigi grumbled, looming over the slumbering heap that was Wario.

"Wake up, Jabba the Hutt!" Waluigi shoved his foot into Wario's ribcage. But it got stuck in the lard surrounding it. "Damn it, Wario!" Waluigi cursed as he frantically tried to free his foot. POP! Waluigi pulled out more than his foot. "Honestly, Wario," He stared disdainfully at the moldy wad of meatloaf stuck to his foot. "I sometimes wonder how I ever put up with you!"

"Peach," Mario stared up at the princess in a very upset manner. "What is the meaning of this?! Who is he?!" Mario held out a picture of Peach in bed with a tall blond man.

"Oh, no," Peach groaned. "Mario, I can explain-"

"You don't have to explain anything! I understand, I'm not-a good enough for you, am I?"

"No, Mario it's not what it looks li-"

"I don't want to hear anymore, _Princess Toadstool_!" Tears were welling up in the heartbroken plumber's moist eyes. Mario walked toward his door, looked back at Peach. His sorrowful expression was replaced by a cold glare. His door shut behind him.

Peach's eyes misted up. "Oh, Mario, if you could just hear me out…"

Waluigi sat at his computer, typing, while Wario, wearing his classic yellow shirt and purple overalls watched as his little brother brushed his fingers against the keyboard.

"Surveillance cameras online, Internet browse history and cookies cleared,"

"No!" Wario howled. "Not the cookies!"

"Not those kind of cookies," Waluigi sighed.

"Where are the cookies?" Wario asked. "I'm hungry."

"You just had lunch an hour ago!"

"…'C' is for cookie; that's good enough for me,"

"Then go to the cafeteria, and get your stupid cookie! I'm busy!

"Why are we watching these, Link?" Zelda asked. "Those games were a big mistake!"

"I know, Zelda," Link said. "But these videos do great justice."

Link pointed at the large screen plasma, showing a poorly drawn image of Link distorted in a twirling color show. "The guy hit it right on the dot."

"Link, can we watch something else?"

"Sure thing, Zelda." With a press of the Wii-mote's 'A' button, Link paused the video. "What do you want to watch?"

"Find a slideshow with us that plays _Girlfriend_."

Link cringed, but he clicked on the search box, and entered the key words and clicked 'search'.

"It won't load," Zelda stared, disappointed, at the 'failed to load' message on the screen.

"Thank you, Goddesses!" Link praised quietly.

"What was that, Link?" Zelda raised an eyebrow at the Hylian hero, smirking sternly.

Luigi climbed to the top bunk, where his brother was curled up, sulking. "Mario?"

"Go away, Weege," the older brother moaned.

"Mario, please listen to me. Those were fake."

"What were fake?"

"The pictures," Luigi replied. "They were drawn by an obsessed fanboy on the Internet."

"Really?" Mario asked, not fully convinced.

"I spoke with Peach," Luigi nodded. "She even showed me the artist's web page. There was never anything between her and that guy."

"I don't know what to believe, Weege," Mario sighed. "But I want to see the proof. Show me the web page."

"Right down there," Luigi pointed at the web address at the bottom of the paper. "But you'll have to wait till the Internet's back up."

Mario sat up, holding the fanart. He stared at the web address when he felt a small peck on his cheek. He slowly turned his head toward Luigi, giving him a "What was that?" look.

"That was from Peach," Luigi said sheepishly. "She loves you, and I know you love her."

"Who does that 'Gold-a Barron' think he is?" Wario growled. "Waluigi, look what I got in the mail! The nerve of this-a guy!" He handed the parchment to Waluigi.

Waluigi took a glimpse at the letter, which read:

"All your gold are belong to me!"

~Gold Barron

"Wario," The assist trophy threw the parchment back to his brother. "That was me! I wrote that!"

"Why?"

"Covering our tracks," Waluigi whispered.

"That's stupid!"

"Tell me about it! Why won't the damn Internet cooperate?"

"Maybe because you're cussing at it a lot?"

"Wario! Did you actually say something halfway intelligent?"

-knock, knock-

Wario went to the door and swung it open. "I'm-a Wario! I'm-a gonna win!"

"Here is the map." In front of the treasure hunter stood Shadow holding a parchment filled with squiggly lines and crudely drawn shapes. "Where do you wish do go?"

"We don't want any!" Wario slammed the door.

"Dare I ask who that was?" Waluigi spun his office chair toward Wario.

"Emohog playing door-to-door salesman.

"Peach?" Mario stepped into Peach's open door. His jaw dropped. "What the?!"

Bowser lied on the floor, tied up and beaten. Peach stood fiercely, clutching her frying pan, on top of the Koopa King. "You're right," she glared at Mario. "I don't need help! I can defend myself!"

"Peach, I want to apologize for the things I said earlier. I looked at the artist's web page when the Internet got back up and running."

Peach eyed Mario expectantly.

"I understand now; I understand that nothing is sacred on the Internet." Mario took off his hat and looked into Peach's eyes pleadingly. "Can you forgive a fool who refused to listen?"

Peach bent down and kissed Mario on the nose. "You are forgiven. I would have reacted the same way. We can keep things sacred here."

"I'm gunna be the one to take ya down!" Wolf tapped the spacebar rapidly. On the computer he was shooting up a bunch of characters in green armor. Wolf's door creaked open. "Who's that?"

In steps Wario fitted with blue body paint, fox ears, a fox tail, and revealing cloth on his chest and midsection.

"Krystal!" Wolf gasped. "What are you doing here?"

"Panther has lost interest in me, sadly," Wario purred in the most feminine british voice he could muster. "I'm looking for a bundle of fur that will care for me, and sleep with me." In his thoughts, Waluigi, I am so going to kill you for this!

Wolf smirked a dark smile. "We're gunna have fun with this thang!"

"!"

Nearby in Wolf's air vent, *beepbeepbeep beepbeepbeep* "Colonel," Snake whispered. "What is going on?"

"That's bestiality, Snake." Colonel Campbell replied.

"Ugh! Is that legal?!"

"Sadly, no."

"'Sadly?!' Are you kidding me?!"

"Ah face it, Snake. Once a furry, always a furry."

"I found it, Wario!" Waluigi shouted joyfully.

"What did ya find?" Wario asked with a mouthful of garlic.

Waluigi yanked one of Wario's suspenders toward him and whispered, "Our next prank, Tubby the Vampire Repellant! Tonight, at seven we report to the shed behind the mansion."

"By the way, Wally, before I forget," Wario suddenly stated gnawing on his little brother.

"AGH! What the hell, Wario?!"

"That's for making me commit bestiality! What were you trying to prove anyway, Waluigi?"

"That only fags play Halo! And where did you learn that term anyway?"

"I heard it from Wolf's air vent."

Waluigi blinked cluelessly. "You're even sadder than I thought."


End file.
